So here it is, two weeks past my birthday, and I have yet to thank all of you for the wonderful birthday wishes. Unfortunately, my life has been as insane as my first ex-husband, so I have been remiss in my duties. I have not been around dA at all lately. So...
To everyone that wished me a Happy Birthday:
THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THANK YOU. I LOVE YOU ALL.
Sorry for my lack of manners in not responding. Between school starting, my disability hearing, moving into a new apartment, and my latest majorly depressive episode, things in my life have been off the charts nuts. If it weren't for my amazing boyfriend,
Rommel101, I honestly think I would've gone out back and jumped in front of the freight train that runs behind my apartment complex.
My depression has been ridiculous lately. I am struggling majorly with school. I transferred to a new university - the American Military University - and even though I'm in a much better history program (military history! Yay!), I've lost a lot of credits and have to take a bunch of general education courses (political science, literature, etc.) that I DO. NOT. WANT. And when I don't like something, my brain goes haywire.
But then again, my brain's been haywire for quite some time, school notwithstanding. My brain says, "Fuck you, assignment due dates!" Yeah, so
not good. Thankfully, my shrink is trying to help me out with that.
I've been in my new place for less than a month, and there's still so much I have to do. And I'm under the gun....if things go right (which they never seem to do anymore),
Rommel101 will be here possibly next weekend. We're waiting for his leave to get approved so that he can come out here. And if he is.......let me just say that it looks like a home good store threw up in my apartment. Yeah. Lovely.
I do things when I can. My back is getting worse, and I can't stand up for any length of time. I have three bulging discs in my lower back that are wreaking havoc with my spine, and that's just for starters. I have to do things in spurts...fifteen minutes of doing stuff, and then one hour stretched out in my recliner to try to ease the pain. My right leg gets weak and my feet both go numb. I feel like my hip is being pulled out of joint.
But despite all of the bad shit, there is some good, believe it or not. I have an amazing family that has been extremely supportive throughout my ordeals. My parents have been amazing...they have gone above and beyond anything I could have ever imagined. And my friends...they are the best. You all know who you are.
And then there's
Rommel101. My life, my love, my whole world. He has been the single most steadying influence in my life. My biggest cheerleader. My rock, my strength, my support. I love my Wolf, so very much.
Eventually, there will be more art. Maybe. Someday...